We've been aware of animal's ulterior motives since the dawn of television. Image © Warner Bros. All rights reserved.
- Jesus returned to Earth, but God didn’t.
- Wikipedia incurred the wrath of Xenu.
- Evil animals threatened to destroy modern civilisation on multiple occasions. So did yoghurt.
- Piers Morgan proved himself worthy of sainthood, while his TV show discriminated against perennial underdogs, men.
- Microsoft put a Bing on it. Time Warner took the ring off.
- Barack Obama threatened national security, and revealed his America-hating ways.
- MPs spent some money and pissed people off.
- Selfish bakers caused children to eat Lego, and selfish humans caused animals to get sick by being eaten by them.
- Environmentalists polluted the environment with noise, girls polluted the environment by being born, childless women polluted the environment with their empty uteri.
- Not paying attention in school created a criminal mastermind.
- Shock-inducing research changed our lives forever.
- Phones were banned, unbanned and threatened.
- Women proved they couldn’t be trusted with proper jobs. Or bingo membership.
- Britons suffer indignity of slow internet, and a man gave a epic demonstration of irony.
