Photographer Captures Moment of Rare Squirrel Aerial Attack

Photo: Navicore

Evil Penguins ‘Planned to Overthrow Government’

P-p-p-pissed off

An undercover government operation today unveiled a decade-long plan by a parcel of anti-capitalist penguins to overthrow the governnment and begin a Marxist revolution.

The penguins are thought to have been incensed by recent scandals within government including the banking crisis and the still unresolved expenses scandals that revealed corruption within centralised government, and their constant misrepresentation on chocolate bar wrappers. The leader of the parcel, known as ‘Pingu’ said of their actions,

We are tired of the constant stereotypes forced upon us. For too long humans have misinterpreted our evil intentions for innocent cutesiness. We’ve had enough of this social isolation that is so endemic in capitalist societies. It was time for a change. Penguin style.

Most of the remaining penguins fled upon the ambush of their secretive headquarters, so were unavailable for comment. Or a bit of a funny joke.

Relaxation ‘Increases Stress’

  

Don't be fooled. She's actually really stressed.

Shocking results of research published today has found a prominent link between relaxation and high stress levels. 

In a study of passengers at 59 various airports around the world, 82 sceintists surveyed over 2 vacationers before and after they went on their ‘relaxing’ holiday.

Before leaving for their holiday, those who were expecting to have the most relaxing holiday were actually the most stressed upon their return. Thus irrefutable proving that all holidays ever actually make everyone more miserable than before.

Dr. Ian Diotic, head of the study, summarised,

It’s an all-to-common assumption that holidays and relaxation are good for lowering stress levels, but we’ve clearly proven here that the opposite is actually true. 

In light of this new information, those who are seeking relaxation are advised to get a job with an angrier boss, take the most congested route home after work, enroll in University, listen to heavy metal or have children.

via: The Institute of Idiotic Studies.